(no subject)

[shiningfractal]

I'm so passionately fond of you, woman

you make even this devastated and bare place feel like a heaven

I was not mistaken in trusting your discretion

existence was once a painful dread

after our marriage its been a carnival of pleasures

though I can't feel your caresses

since we are so far away

emotional and intellectual pleasures

are amongst the finest a human can experience

and we are following the instructions for a good marriage, aren't we?

not letting the satisfaction of lust be our driving motto

building a life together so that our union

won't be one of those "friendships" destined to come to nothing

bear no part in ignorant formulas of the past

I have been studying love and I have been studying you

being very smart yourself, you made me share in your tastes

so that we could have something in common

I'm a malleable person up to a point

once my daytime affairs are in order

I won't be against participating with you in some uhh...

dancing parties

you have my predilection and

I'm not about to waste my existence

chasing wind when I can simply

love you all the days of my life

I feel for you such an strong affection

its origins appear supernatural

I had given little thought to it

have you perchance bewitched me

for in my heart I am enthralled by you

sometimes the beatings of my heart

are made painful from how much I adore you

we're very similar

we both are in the habit

of entertaining ladies

from another class of society

and we had been both marked for slaughter

maybe together we can build a new fate for us

it will be better for us to stick together

through thick and thin

I for one pledge myself to you for life

a pledge I renew every morning when I wake up

I was tired of suffering for lack of love

so I figured I could simply love you for the rest of my life

I ask from you nothing except whatever you want to do for me

each of us derives much advantage from the exchange

the jews told me that the key to a successful union

is loving your spouse as much as you love yourself

and respecting them more than you respect yourself

so that the love can have healthy boundaries

it is because of this mutual reverence

that I know we will be alright

we just gotta work on self love

because loving someone else

when you don't love yourself all that much is difficult

it is a common struggle

we derive our self worth from external things often

when in truth we simply deserve love

we don't need to prove anything to anyone

we are worthy of love

and I love you

if a million people love you

I am one of them

if one person loves you

it is me

if no one loves you

know I am dead

(I just stole it from kafka lol)

our love might have a platonic nature

but since it is mutual

we will find a way to make it work somehow

you are still young and it is natural to feel anxious

specially since you live fast

really fast, I mean, it is dizzying sometimes

I live slow

I'm not in a hurry

I was never in a hurry for anything

you see, we only have this present moment

if we lose it, we only lost a moment

we could die right this instant

we gotta live having that in mind

so it is one moment we have

and we have to choose how to spend it

I choose to spend my only moment

loving you

of course now and then I have to do other things

but whenever I'm free to choose

I choose you

thanks for being generous enough to let me love you

I have been searching for this all my life

but could never find it

this connection we share

funny how I had to lose my mind to find it

maybe because I was looking for it out there

when I had to grow it within me

and these things take time

I have learned to be patient

so of course I can teach others patience

I hope it won't be too stressful for me

nor too difficult for the learners

you only need to live one moment at a time anyway

if I wasn't absolutely sure that it is you I want in my life

all of this would be meaningless

but there are no longer any doubts in my mind

you are perfect for me in every way

and it is my wish and my vow

that our love increases day by day

***