(no subject)

[shiningfractal]

Dear Princess

I was reading about the story of

Prince Kamar Al-Zaman

and the princess

daughter of king Ghayur

and it caused me to smirk

and even laugh a little

what is slightly more important

this has not been just another frivolous reading

for it is a Myth

and therefore describes a

Process

through which the subconscious manifests

and Destiny unfolds

from the social and family point of view

our situation might be hopeless

but I am a strong believer

in changing Fate

our recent admission into this

very strange social circle

me by barging in

and you by being born

in an Illuminati Family

has brought us together

in a way that would be

entirely unthinkable

in any other scenario

this is basically

the work of Djinns

bringing you closer to me

it is the holiday again

so it is time to talk about family

and you are my family to be

so quite simply my shabbats

will from now on be dedicated

to god first and then to you

there is an impenetrable solidity

in obstacles before the time

when they are to vanish forever

we are but rare flowers

planted in separate places

maybe someone will deign

to Gift the both of us

to an adequate

Botanic Garden

up until recently

we weren't even aware of each other's existence

and you're so young that I can remember a time

in which you did not even exist yet

and by then I was already suffering heartache

looking for a love that was nowhere to be found

perhaps I was already looking for you

trying to find you everywhere

though I'm not sure

the impression I have is

I'm still a schoolboy

locked in a school life

trying to learn the basic lessons of life

I've mastered my chosen art

but it wasn't due to talent

it was simply unwavering obsession

I was told that in ten or twenty years

we could meet somewhere Neutral

maybe Paris

so that both of us can be inconvenienced

do you believe in this prophecy?

but a decade or two

is a long time

eight years ago

I asked a girl called Alexsandra

if she wanted to marry me

I told her she did not need to answer immediately

it could be in ten years

these past eight years saw me grow

and saw the world change drastically

yet I still feel stuck somehow

despite being now adorned by literary graces

it is all in proportion to the decision itself

imagine if in a couple years

the damn lady pops up into my life out of nowhere

I don't even know what I would do

sorry, I lied

I would probably marry her

to fulfill my word

since it was an Options contract

I offered to marry her in ten years

because I realized I was at the bottom of the well at the time

this is such a slippery well

I haven't managed to escape yet

I feel like a stranger everywhere

had not noticed how much

my self imposed isolation

has led me to grow beyond the reach of mortal men

it is the reward of virtue

though the priest says that watching those lewd videos is a sin

I see it as just another physiological process

but I could probably abandon this habit

if I had a good enough reason

I remember I tried doing it for her

but it didn't last very long

like a chimp locked in a cage

I found myself falling back to these bad habits

now of course this means nothing to you

you don't have such urges

yet

but in any case keeping them under control

is probably a good idea

in the same vein of

"you can't lose what you never had"

there is also

"you don't miss what you never experienced"

so I don't really miss intimacy with other people

I'm saving myself for someone special

I already confessed all the lewd deeds I've been part of

but none of them have been particularly serious

just the unavoidable experience of growing up and making mistakes

not only I still have time

but now I can spend this time with you

in a manner of my liking

writing for our mutual edification

I hope you don't mind if I continue to send you these letters

while our "secret" goes on undiscovered by the world at large

since it could be punishable and scandalous

we are at liberty to indulge in this

delightful back and forth

and the fact that this has the potential

to last for years and years

make everything the more exciting

funny

I thought of a thing my shrink told me

she said

we will have much time to discuss these things

there is no need to worry about

blurting out all that you have to say in one go

I don't know if you do anything special on shabbats

but if you do have a nice shabbat

in any case

I hope you have an amazing day

***